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TRUE

STORY

It didn't seem to make any sense. I had emptiness inside. He revealed sins I tried to
everything I could ever want. My parents justify to myself, or never knew existed in
worked hard for the life they had given me. the first place. I became aware of how
The guilt of my ingratitude ate me away wicked my heart truly is. The thoughts I
because I didn't know why I wasn't happy. have sometimes, admittedly, are splattered
with impurity, jealousy, discontentment,
College rolled around and since 'Christianity' and genuine malice. The pride that kept me
wasn't giving me what I thought I deserved, from accepting Jesus in the first place is still
I decided I wanted no part of it. I didn’t as real as it ever was. In those vulnerable
want to be the church mouse anymore. I times of conviction and repentance, I
was ready for “the college experience” and began to understand the reality and power
was secretly thrilled to be on my own, of what Christ did for me, something I had
making my own decisions. I came to Stout never understood despite my presence in
with church still a part of who I was, but I my church back home. I’ve realized that no
didn’t feel as though I needed God because I thought of mine is evil enough to undo
thought my life was going in the right what Christ did on the cross. I’ve learned
You know what's got to be one of the direction with or without Him. From then on about what it means to be a faithful
hardest things in the world to do? Admit to out, I was going to create the life I wanted, member of a Christian community and a
yourself that you have a problem. That, in with no restraints on what I could or diligent servant for God and man alike. And
and of itself, was my problem. Growing up couldn’t do. Thankfully, God didn’t let me just now, as I’m writing this, I have realized
in the Lutheran church, I was heavily wander too far. The night I moved into my that God was with me the whole time,
involved in every kind of church activity one dorm freshman year, campus was buzzing leading me to and preparing me for the
could imagine. Sunday School teacher, on the walk back from Blue-Rah, Stout’s pep moment I would truly let Him have control
Junior Catechism mentor, Senior Tribal -rally for all of the freshmen. My roommate over my life. I understand now that the
leader in my youth group, Vacation Bible and I were joking around with some girls we reason ‘Christianity’ wasn’t working for me
School leader, the whole works. I had been had met on our floor when I noticed a pair before was because I didn’t see the sin
on two mission trips and was always
encouraging others to do the same. By the SOMEHOW, IN THE MIDST OF MY FAIRYTALE LIFE,
world’s standards, you could say I was a
fairly good person. I didn’t drink, do drugs, IT DIDN'T SEEM GOOD ENOUGH.
or sleep around. My 4.0 GPA and near
perfect church attendance were the badges of bare feet walking a few steps ahead of inside me. I now know that being a
of honor I wore on my sleeve. My parents me. Curious, I whispered to my roommate, Christian is not just being a good person.
are still happily married in a world that has asking what her guess was for why he was It’s about recognizing and turning from
made this a precious rarity, and I lived in a doing it. Before I knew it, my roommate had your sinful nature, and living to glorify the
beautiful, new home on a cul-de-sac in the pushed me forward and I was walking next only One who can save you from it.
suburbs. From the outside, my life was as to him. We got to talking and a few days
perfect as a life could get. later, I found out he was a Christian. Today, I know why I go to church on
Coincidence? I refuse to believe it. Sunday mornings. I know why I say I’m a
On the inside, the pressures of being a Christian. It’s because I have chosen to
teenage girl gained far too much control of Since that day, my life has been a believe in God and the promises He makes
my mind. Was I thin enough? Smart rollercoaster of sorrows and smiles. After in His Word. It’s because I am overjoyed
enough? Confident enough? I answered that moment, I slowly opened up to the idea that the same power that raised Christ
'no' to all of these questions, which spiraled that running from God is simply not an from the dead is alive in me, molding me
into a severe bout of depression. I asked option. He will always find us because He into something entirely new for His glory.
myself the same questions many others ask loves us and longs to be in a relationship
themselves late at night. Why am I here? with us. I got involved with Street Level 2 Corinthians 5:17 - This means that
What is the meaning of life? Is there more Ministries and Jesus Fellowship, and have anyone who belongs to Christ has become a
to the world than the small walls of high been accepted with open arms into that new person. The old life is gone; a new life
school? I sure hoped so because somehow, family. God opened my eyes to show me has begun!
in the midst of my fairytale life, it didn't that living for myself and for the fleeting
seem good enough. pleasures of the world will bring nothing but
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