Page 6 - WOTS 82

large group for the first time. Seeking to serve God more, I
began serving in my church’s nursery and later as a service
host (usher).

During high school, I tried to become more of a disciple in
speaking about Jesus with my non-Christian friends, and I
sang in my senior high worship band. With less and less in
common with my non-Christian friends, I drifted apart from
my former friend group who fell into drinking and partying.
At the end of high school, our senior high pastor told our
tight-knit group that statistics say that most of us will fall
away from the faith and not pursue Jesus in our adult lives.
His point was that the church equipped us with everything
we’d need to preserve our faith and do amazing things for
God. I was determined to prove that statistic wrong. At that
point, I had an attitude like Peter that I would never betray
Jesus, and that I would never be a person that questions
God (Matthew 26:33-35).

Fast forward to my freshman year of college. I took a
psychology class with a professor who I respected in many
ways but was a devout atheist. I tried not to let her
philosophies taint what I thought I believed so strongly.
However, many of the questions and doubts I had not
previously explored festered in my mind. Soon I fell into a
spell of doubt and despair that lasted two and a half years.
My thoughts raced: How could I believe in God if there is so
UNDERSTANDING FAITH much we can’t know? Does the Bible have laws that
contradict each other? And are they impossible to follow? It
This testimony is from Hannah, a member of Street Level came down to pride. God is the only One who knows
Ministries in Menomonie, WI everything, and by insisting I must know everything about
God before I can know Him, I was putting myself on the
same level as Him. What I began to understand later is the
I loves us are impossible to follow on our own, but God
laws that God puts in the Bible to protect us because He
grew up with my single mom in a suburb of Minneapolis,
makes anything possible. It took years before I realized this.
Minnesota, while I occasionally visited my dad in San

Diego, California. Both of my parents call themselves
Christians, but I am not sure if they are really believers. I
pray that they know and live for God zealously. Still, I am I felt depressed and alone. While working on general
education requirements at my community college, there
blessed that they introduced me to Jesus and the church at a was an opportunity for me to join a Bible study at school
young age. and the college ministry at my church. I went to a couple of
meetings and stopped going. My church attendance
In fourth grade during a Wednesday small group, I asked became off and on, yet I continued to be a service host. I
God to forgive me of my sins and come into my heart remember feeling like an impostor going to church while, at
because it sounded like a pretty good gig, but I didn’t know one point, telling close family that I was agnostic. However,
exactly what it entailed. Throughout middle school, my faith I continued to go as it forced me to think about the
became more of my own as opposed to something inherited meaning of life. I wanted there to be a God even though I
by my family. In eighth grade, I went through a class that was not sure of His existence anymore. This period of my
was like confirmation for my non-denominational church life was very humbling. God allowed me to be broken so I
called Approved Unto God (AUG). It taught me complex could truly understand what faith meant and trust Him with
doctrines that helped me to strengthen and mature in my everything.
faith. Yet, I still had some unanswered questions that I didn’t
pursue answers to and instead ignored. At the end of AUG, I Toward the end of my sophomore year of college, I was
joined our junior high ministry in serving the community in weary and disillusioned. I would pray to God that if He does
Colorado on a mission trip where I shared my testimony in a exist, that He would reveal who He really was to me and

6 WORD ON THE STREET MAGAZINE